Fathers are playing a more active part in their young children’s upbringing - something that voluntary groups and social care agencies are now waking up to. Not before time, writes Kate Coxon.
From this April British fathers will finally have the right to two weeks’ paid paternity leave. Later this year, Grimsby Maternity Hospital is to open a pioneering new unit with purpose-built double bedrooms and en-suite facilities where both parents can stay for the period of the mother’s admission to hospital. Fathers will be actively brought into caring for partners and infants. The message is clear: involving fathers in their children’s lives from early on is vital.
A growing body of research points to the importance of father involvement. Having an involved father helps a child’s social and emotional well-being and improves academic performance. It may also reduce the risk of adverse outcomes in later life, such as participation in crime.
Even so, the good news about fathers is often overshadowed by the bad. A review of fatherhood in 2000 for the Joseph Rowntree Foundation by professor Charlie Lewis concluded that: "Men’s parenting is often depicted as a social problem rather than a social strength. Fathers are often visible only in terms of their absence: working long hours, not living with their children or lacking legal rights as parents."
Jack O’ Sullivan of the charity Fathers Direct cites research undertaken last year at the University of East Anglia, which suggested that fathers actually undertake a third of all child care duties. "Men are in charge of their kids more than we think, perhaps more than we care to admit. It’s vital that they are competent, able and confident with their children."
But while mothers may attend parent-toddler groups and other facilities, it can be harder to encourage fathers to take up opportunities for support with their parenting. John Roberts, a consultant and trainer at Leicester Family Service Unit (FSU) has run fathers’ groups for several years. While he has noticed an enormous cultural shift in this time - "superdads" like David Beckham have made pushing a pram acceptable - he feels that practitioners must address men very differently from women if they want fathers to be involved or even turn up at all.
"It’s no good expecting dads to attend touchy feely groups sitting in a circle in a health centre. In my experience, men need to be given a degree of choice and some autonomy." The informal structure of a drop-in is ideal, according to Roberts. "There can still be structured activities, but fathers can come and go as they please." He advises a proactive approach: to attract fathers you need to go out and find them. This might mean leaving flyers in pubs, clubs, barbers shops and supermarkets.
The venue must be right: spaces for fathers need to be inclusive and welcoming. The Leicester FSU fathers meet in a purpose-built community centre which receives funding from the education department. Computer terminals were found to be a welcoming and inviting influence.
Developing good communication skills with men is important. "If a father does come to a group, don’t ask too many questions at the first point of contact," advises Roberts. "On the whole, men don’t tend to feel comfortable sharing personal information or exploring feelings straightaway - they need to be relaxed to do that." They are more likely to open up when things are kept on a factual, knowledge-based level and may find it easier to interact with their children and other fathers over a shared activity, such as a sport or a computer game.
Similar thinking has inspired Dads and Lads, an innovative project which uses sport to enhance positive interaction and communication within the home environment. The Home Office has funded YMCA England in conjunction with Care for the Family to set up such projects across England. In many areas, Dads and Lads groups have formed links with local football clubs, involving fathers and sons from pre-school age to late teens.
But there may be other obstacles to overcome. Keith Nicholls, a father and facilitator of a fathers’ group in Barrow, Cumbria points out that some people are suspicious of men around children. "This can operate as a barrier both for fathers who want to take part in activities with their children, and for practitioners trying to involve them," he says.
To coincide with the introduction of paid paternity leave, a new magazine will be launched for new fathers and distributed through maternity hospitals. Jack O’ Sullivan believes that this kind of early intervention is the real way forward. "We know that around 90 per cent of men are present at the first scan and 95 per cent at the birth. Some midwives and health visitors have realised that this is a fantastic opportunity to get men involved from the start and begin to explore issues of fatherhood at this point." He adds: "We need to make this good practice universal. The earlier fathers become involved, the better it is for their children."
- More information from YMCA England Dads and Lads project: 07850 112641; Fathers Direct www.fathersdirect.com
Fathers are important too
Continuing research at the University of Oxford based on the National Child Development Study (NCDS) has followed up 17, 000 children at ages seven, 11, 16, 23 and 33. Key findings of the research to date are that:
Make your venue father-friendly
Dads RUs:
Barrow Sure Start, Cumbria
Dads R Us runs informal meeting groups for male carers and
their children in Barrow. The first group was set up in March 2001
by Dave Morrison, community support manager for Barrow Sure Start
who oversees Dads R Us groups in five different wards in Barrow.
"At the start, it was to tackle the ‘McDonald’s dad
syndrome’ - separated dads with nowhere to take their kids on
Saturday. Now we have 50 to 60 resident and non-resident dads and
their children attending the groups. The majority of children are
primary-school age."
One of the schemes users, Dave Heseltine, says: "I was a bit dubious at the start but the kids love it and the camaraderie is great. I now manage the football team."
The five groups come together for roller discos and swimming, day trips and weekend breaks. "Cook and eat" courses have proved especially popular and there are also activities targeted at new fathers such as parenting classes.
Barrow is a former shipbuilding area, with high levels of unemployment. Promoting fatherhood has played a role in community regeneration. "It’s successful because local dads have ownership over the group. Some unemployed fathers have retrained as community workers," says Dave Morrison.