News

Finsbury Park in London has become associated with the activities of its controversial mosque. But it deserves to be better known for a project that helps parents raise their children.

Chance UK started in 1995 as a crime prevention initiative aimed at five to 11 year olds in the boroughs of Hackney and Islington. Each child referred to the project by their school, social services or the police because of their behaviour was offered a mentor for 12 months.

This work continues and the organisation sees about 100 children a year. In June 2003 it broadened its scope to become the first agency in the UK to offer its clients' parents their own mentor. Its ParentPlus scheme is funded by a £140,000 grant over three years from the Department for Education and Skills. Over the next year, as long as it obtains the necessary funding, it hopes to replicate its work in three or four projects in other parts of the UK.


The charity's office is based in the London Fashion Centre on Font Hill Road, two floors above a shoe shop promising "All-leather trainers for £10". Chief executive Gracia McGrath says the motivation behind ParentPlus is simple: "It became clear that a lot of difficulties children had were because of their chaotic lifestyles at home."

Some parents had also inquired about having their own mentor after seeing the positive impact mentoring had on their child's behaviour.

To become a parent mentor, volunteers must have professional experience of working with children and their families and, ideally, have their own children. McGrath is adamant that mentors should not be using the position to try to work out issues from their own childhood.

The programme fits with the government's push for parents to take greater responsibility for their children's behaviour, most notably through parenting classes and parenting orders. However, McGrath argues that supporting a parent in their home is more effective than teaching them in a classroom: "A mentor is a facilitator who can bring out the best in the parent. We are trying to enhance the parent rather than lecture them."

So far 10 of the 21 parents who started ParentPlus have completed the scheme. They received between two and four hours' support a week over a three-month period. ParentPlus programme manager Kate Lawton has trained 23 volunteers to be parent mentors - some of whom are working with their second or third parents - and is always looking for more volunteers.

PARENT
Pauline Blake* is 48 and from Islington. She smiles broadly when she says her graduation certificate for completing ParentPlus is on display in her living room: "It's in the front of the unit, so you can see it." She has two adult children, aged 28 and 22, and a 12-year-old son, Reece,* who has attended Chance UK since last February. "He would get in a lot of scrapes at school and even if it wasn't his fault he used to be blamed for it."

Blake would wake up with a headache because she was so upset about Reece's disruptive behaviour. He didn't listen to her and they were not close. "I felt like I was fighting a losing battle," she says.

A few months after Reece had been going to Chance UK Blake was offered her own mentor. She jumped at the chance because of the positive effect mentoring was having on her son. "I wanted to get my peace of mind back. I wanted to see if they could help me cope with Reece." Blake was matched with her mentor, Comfort Nkrumah, herself a parent of two. Initially, Blake held back from opening up to Nkrumah, but after a couple of weeks she felt she could confide in her. "I felt like we had known each other for years. It was like a weight coming off my shoulders," she says.

Blake worked hard with Nkrumah to establish boundaries for Reece at his bedtime, the time he came home from playing outside and his homework. At first Blake struggled as Reece was reluctant to abide by the new rules. So she sat him down and explained why they were necessary. However, he still came home late and he was banned from going out for a week. Blake says: "I felt good because I was in charge, not him. In the past he was going on like he was the mum and I was the son."


Blake describes Nkrumah as a "godsend" and recommends mentoring as a way for other parents to improve their family's life. Now she feels she and Reece have a much improved relationship and the whole family gets on better. Blake says: "In the past I would open the door and think 'Oh no, I have to come back to this miserable house again'. Now I open it and feel happy."

MENTOR
When she was pregnant with her second child last spring, 32-year-old Katja Ramharter saw an advert for Chance UK in a shop window in Hackney. With a background in child protection, she was training to be a family therapist and wanted more practical experience working with children and their families. Ramharter completed ParentPlus's training and in December became a mentor to Karen Smyth,* a mother of two girls aged two and four, and nine-year-old James* who attends the scheme.

Ramharter says her work with Smyth was initially constructive and she was pleased with what her client wanted to achieve. "At the first session Karen was ambitious and focused and wanted to create a behavioural chart for James. I was impressed at how good she was at coming up with achievable goals for him."

They devised three goals for each member of Smyth's family during the mentoring period. But on Ramharter's second pre-arranged visit Smyth was not at home and she only attended three out of six sessions before deciding to drop out of the initiative. Ramharter says: "It is difficult for Karen at the moment and, although she really wants to make some changes, it is might not be the right time yet."

Despite the hiccup, Ramharter is not dissuaded from the benefits of parent mentoring for those mothers and fathers who need help. And if Smyth decided to request a mentor in the future, she would happily become involved again.

For Ramharter, the most significant aspect of parent mentoring is that it is the mentor's choice to be involved. "It is very positive for parents to know you are there voluntarily and you are happy to spend time with them," she says. "You haven't got a statutory agenda in any shape or form."

Her involvement with ParentPlus - as well as being a parent - has also influenced Ramharter's working practice as a family support worker at the Dalston Youth Project which works with young offenders and those at risk of exclusion from school. She says: "I have become much softer. When I meet someone who is on their own and whose children may have behavioural problems I just have the utmost respect for them." CC

*Not their real names