This is a study of calls to ChildLine about children's health problems, showing why children may feel unable to confide in adults they know.

Cross's study found that children may be unwilling to tell parents for fear of worrying them, or in case the parents are indiscreet about the child's health condition. Children said that sometimes parents tell them their illness is a punishment, or become overprotective. Others may feel unable to talk to their mothers about their bodies: one even concealed the fact her periods had started until she realised she could no longer afford sanitary towels.

Doctors were seen as inaccessible. They made pronouncements and did not discuss a child's feelings, even with conditions such as non-specific head or stomach aches where distress could be at the root of the problem. Teenagers often felt they could not ask to see a doctor in private, or feared that confidences would be reported to parents. Girls often prefered a woman doctor, but could not get one.

The illness itself was often distressing. There was fear of pain, especially of needles, but more important was the sense of powerlessness children felt, particularly if their condition was chronic. To retain some control, diabetic children would miss meals or injections, epileptics would miss their medication, and asthmatics would smoke. One girl, caught by school friends with an insulin syringe, claimed she was a drug addict because she felt that was less embarrassing.

They said people can be cruel. Friends would laugh at epileptics who had fits, or be forbidden by parents from playing with them. Parents punished bedwetters. The study found that school nurses were the most trusted group of adults.

Source: S Cross, I Know You're Not a Doctor But….., Childline, 1998.

Available from ChildLine, Royal Mail Building, Studd Street, London

Jim Christopherson is associate lecturer at the University of Nottingham.