I have a problem with one of my clients. It's not his benefits. They are sorted and maximised, his accommodation is fine and he has not relapsed for over a year. So what's the problem?
I can't
stand the guy. He always seems to call when I am on my way to make a coffee, he
tells awful jokes and then laughs at them himself and would it kill him to buy
a handkerchief ?
This
particular situation is a hypothetical one but this is a situation I have come
across a few times in my career.
Suspending judgment
I am not
talking about the service users I have dealt with who do bad things and hurt
other people. Suspending judgement on such clients is as instinctual to social
workers as a dog shaking itself when it gets out of water.
The
client I am talking about is a blameless individual who for some reason I
cannot take to at all. Much as I try to suspend any personal feelings there are
particular clients I could do without calling after I have spent my lunch hour
on hold with British Gas.
I am
sure this is not a one-way process. I can accept, good egg that I am, that I am
probably not everybody's cup of tea. Many of my clients have taken the step of
telling me they do not like me, sometimes in quite florid language.
We're all human
The
question is whether there is anything wrong with this? I would say not. Social
workers are human beings. You cannot choose who you fall in love with and by
the same measure you cannot choose to like somebody when your emotions tell you
that this is not a person you would choose to spend your time with. It is not
unpleasant or unkind to not particularly like someone, it's just part of the
human experience.
So where
does this leave unconditional positive regard? Can you show that to a person
you do not really like. I think it is perfectly possible. If anything it is
easier because a good social worker is self aware and able to work with the
emotions the person may engender in them. If anything, my liberal social worker
guilt tends to lead me to spending more time with these clients. How irritating
is that?
Peter Corser is a social worker working in the Midlands
Click here to read more by Peter
If you don't spend much time with the person, and deal with them fairly and professionally, you are doing your duty by that person - but would you go out of your way to do that 'little bit extra' for him, putting yourself on the line so that arbitrary decisions are not made that affect his life, or even to do something that takes a little bit more effort than usual that makes his life better?
Imagine you are that person, and find that by neccessity you are having to spend large amounts of time, possibly 24 hours a day with supporters and professionals that don't like you, don't share your interests, and just generally rub you up the wrong way.
Perhaps they are supporting you with more intimate parts of your life too.
You'd have to learn much more tolerance and non-judgementality than any of those professionals, who at the end of the day can go home and spend time with people who actually like them.
If personalisation and direct payments end up enabling people to choose the right people to support them, people they actually like and can get on with, then that will be something that makes an enormous difference for many people, and maybe even make life better for the professionals too!
There are ways of managing these iritations and providing a service to a service user. Nobody likes everyone but we can provide a professional service to people that takes into account their service needs as well as their quirks. Contact times can be negotiated as can the manner of service delivery. I had a frequent caller that drove me mad and if I was not in the mood to listen then I would say I only had five minutes to answer the call because I had an appointment elsewhere. I always confirmed the content of these calls in writing(ommitting jokes) including any action I would take and when. Sometimes it helped - when it didn't I'd ask a colleague to come with me to check out my perceptions. You don't need to go mad alone. If it gets so hard to manage maybe swoping irritating clients with other social workers can at least provide variety.