Cindy

I had a client who I can call Cindy. It is not her real name of course.

she is 14 years and she is not feeling fine. Her parents are divorced since many years ago, one year ago the dad started to fight for the custody of the children. Cindy has been living with her mom for almost her entire life.

But now when they started to fight about custody and the parents have a major conflict Cindy does not know what to do. So she said she did not want to live with her mom or her dad so she was placed in a foster home.

It was all good until her mother decides to take Cindy from the foster home because she says this foster home is very bad for her.

so now it is the same situation again for Cindy. she does not want to  choose between her parents and she does not want to live with anyone of them

this week she was caught shoplifting. and she is posting songs and poems about suicide on her blog.

her parents have such a big conflict and it seems like they can not understand how it influence their daughter.

social workers in my workplace told me that Cindys mum is an idiot even before I met her so it is difficult, it does not matter what she says because the team leader and co workers dont trust her or believe what she says

Cindy sends e-mails to me and say she wants to live in a foster home

so now the teamleader has this case and she does nothing. I dont know why

maybe we will not start a new report about her.

and her parents call me often and ask me what we are doing to help Cindy

I want to help this girl but I have not managed to do that. I have to make the parents realise what they are doing but it is difficult to make them listen and do something .

The Team Leader has the Case so is responsible - refer all communications to that person and distance yourself - she is not your responsibility.

Custody matters may be different in Sweden than in the UK, would imagine different personnel with various briefs.

Who are the principle movers in your system?

Also, maybe language confusion in your post but there appear to be dodgy statements and assumptions.

Rupert M:

The Team Leader has the Case so is responsible - refer all communications to that person and distance yourself - she is not your responsibility.

I agree with Rupert.

 

While I agree it's no longer your responsibility as it is now someone else's case I know it is hard to switch off. You must try and keep a distance though and explain to 'cindy' and her parents that they should not be contacting you directly anymore. Is there any specific reason why the case moved to your team manager by the way? Anyway, as for advice re this situation I think I would try and push for some sort of mediation between the parents, let them see what affect their behaviour is having on their daughhter, they don't have to like each other but just agree that they want what is best for their daughter.

If it is not your Case leave well alone and then you will not be able to be criticised for doing anything wrong - leave it up to the Manager.

I sympathise with you as these type of disputes are so hard to unravel and the emotional toil on children is horrendous. Obviously we do not have the option of knocking parents heads together, although that often seems the only sensible way forward.

If you do not have responsibility for the case you need  to leave it alone. If this young person is emailing you these should be forwarded to your manager.

the situation in this country would be very similar, due to this persons age and therefore not being seen asvulnerable.

Could you suggerst to your manager that the young person recieves counselling through school?

 

 

Thanks.

Her parents are still calling me but I tell them to talk to the team leader.

 

 

well done and hope you're ok.