Hi there,
I'm a 3rd year BA student on my final placement at a Community Mental Health Team. I'm a 21 year old female and I pretty much came into this straight from school, bar one year working.
I have done around 60 days of placement and I have 38 (I think) to complete when I come back from the Christmas holidays. My first placement was in an excellent voluntary sector agency.
At the start of this placement I absolutely loved it, albeit in a very naieve way. It was a privilege to be allowed into people's lives so much and to hear their stories. I was very enthusiastic and I learned a lot. I found the work fascinating. I naturally built up good relationships with service users.
Then 10 weeks in, I was part of an initial assessment with a service user who suffered from anxiety, and depression, she self-harmed (hair pulling), and there were a lot of issues around a court case about the sexual abuse she had experienced as a child. I found this assessment EXTREMELY difficult, to the point that I ended up asking if I could take a day off placement to process it.
Since then, I have found going to placement in the morning very anxiety-inducing at times, as well as certain appointments with service users. I am finding the work emotionally demanding, which has decreased my concentration and my desire to be empathic (although naturally I still am). My cases over the last 6 weeks have involved working with a family whose 3 children were put under a supervision order, being part of a Mental Health Review Tribunal, assisting an AMHP with an assessment for a section, going to the police station to shadow him being an appropriate adult, visiting depressed patients and patients with delusions (one of whom hoards), visiting service users on psychiatric wards, being part of a CAF meeting, visiting a service user in hospital after an OD, and talking to service users who self-harm. I visited somebody last week who was sending letters and posters to the royal family.
In the last year some events occurred in my personal life which I believe have raised my stress levels. Coming to work and talking to people who are delusional, paranoid or depressed does not give you much leeway to disengage from your own anxieties. (Previously I found it helpful to go to work in a setting where I could disengage from thoughts about unhappy things!!)
Additionally, I came home for Christmas to find that my cousin had been informally admitted to psychiatric hospital, so that very day I ended up back on a ward. I think that for some reason this happening has triggered certain fears about possible transference of mental health problems.... Having a relative in hospital is also a different experience to visiting a service user there.
In conclusion, social work is MUCH HARDER than I ever imagined or expected. (The other 21 year-old straight out of school student on my placement has told me that she experiences a lot of anxiety as well in the stressful environment, lots of pressure from colleagues etc). I think that perhaps I am just too young to be able to cope well with such stressors. I have been quite honest with my practice teacher about most of these things (except from thoughts about quitting). He says that I am highly competent but lacking in confidence. I had my interim meeting 2 weeks ago - in which I expressed my concerns - and he said that I have met all of my key roles thus far. Since I begun to find placement difficult, I have implemented some of the plans to improve it - better time management with service users, reading about transference/counter-transference, etc - but basically I have just been pushing myself through each day.
I do not think that I want to practice as a social worker, but if I quit my placement, I cannot complete my degree. One of the things I was considering was ending the placement, completing my dissertation and essentially deferring for a year (I think another girl on my course has done this, but in her case because her PT had concerns about her). Essentially at this stage, I just want my degree!! I don't care if I never practice but I don't want to leave university after three years with nothing to show for it. In an ideal world, I would end this placement now, write my dissertation, take three or four years to work, grow up and get experience, and then return to finish my final placement and my final module.
Does anybody have any advice?
Do you think it is normal to feel such anxiety about placement?
I'd really appreciate any advice or comments!
Thank-you :)
Hi just seen your post and didnt want to not reply - sounds like you have a lot going on, but as an outsider it also does sound like you are being incredibly proactive and reflective in dealing with your anxieties.
I'm a third year student and it feels like a huge workload ontop of processing a stressful placement. I too felt overwhelmed earlier on in my placemet and seriously thought about doing the same as you. However, I was worried that if I stopped I wouldnt go back. I'm working in a stat CP team and statutory social work is a shock to the system at times!
You say you dont want to be a social worker - not sure I do some days but I do want to finish and get the degree. You have a relatively short time left, if you can bear to I would advise you to keep going. I think you sound like a very mature and compassionate person, who is being a bit hard on herself maybe? Perhaps statutory mental health work isnt for you (at this time) or maybe you are having an entirely appropriate and understandable reaction to a difficult line of work. Maybe it would be more of a worry if you werent feeling anxious or concerned about aspects of the job. That was certainly the view of my PE when I told her I found some aspects difficult.
Not sure what your uni policy is on assigments etc - if you are writing them as well as the placement/dissertation (I am) - maybe you could apply for an extension if this is the case and ease the pressure a bit that way. If not could you do less time on placement and pace yourself?
If it really does all feel too much then of course talk to the uni about stopping - dont jeopardise your health over the course. But from the sounds of it you would probably make an excellent worker! I dont think your worries are anything out of the ordinary. I would say most of the students on my course are feeling the strain and probably none actually want to do social work at the moment. However, things will get better, you are over half way so at the risk of sounding cliched Keep Calm and Carry On!!
Good luck - and post how you get on
Have asked some people if they wouldn't mind commenting. Seems there are lots of things going on that are making you feel uneasy, but sometimes it may help if others who have worked in this kind of environment can offer some advice. As a student it often helped if I understood the way I was feeling in a more theoretical sense... and this worked, for me at least, very well when I was in a mental health placement.
p.s. the transference and counter transference is important to grasp as you mention. As is the projection. Also important to understand the stigma of mental health and how, in some way, whether conciously or not, it can impact on the way you are thinking and feeling... particularly if you have been involved in some quite distressing stuff.
Firstly I am so sorry I didn't see this post earlier.
Secondly, I have been pretty much exactly where you are now. I have to say I think you're so brave for discussing this. I can only do so retrospectively! And it shows a great deal of maturity and responsibility admitting that you are struggling and having doubts about yourself and your abilities. I was absolutely devastated at the thought of having to take time out, especially as I couldn't have another placement for 10 months and money was already tight. But it basically came down to looking at the bigger picture. Would it really be beneficial to you to continue and possibly become more ill? Would it really be beneficial to service users to have someone who couldn't focus mainly on them when they need support the most? Personally I did take time out. I won't lie, the first couple of months were horrible and I did sink further into depression. But after that I became so determined to prove to myself, and to everyone else, that I could do it. I was terribly anxious about returning to another placement but I was open and honest with everyone from the beginning and got the support I needed. The best thing was that the majority of my anxieties were completely unfounded and addressed within days of starting again! And, perhaps most importantly, I worked in a completely different setting with a completely new set of people around me. And now, I have a masters degree and a full-time job that I am so proud of.
Just remember, this one area of social work you're in at the moment is just that, one area. Don't judge the whole profession on this one experience because things change, not just when you get to choose where you work, but when you move on from being a 'student' to an actual social worker. It's surprising how much your confidence can improve just from that title change!
No one can tell you what to do, I know that would probably be so helpful if someone could just say "this is the right path" but only you will know what that is. How do you feel about lists of pros and cons? Lol. I could probably go on and on about my thoughts and possible options etc but I don't want to give you completely irrelevant musings. Please just ask any specific questions you may have?
You're in your third year, so I would finish the course if I were you. You may as well get something out of it now. No law then says that you have to go into 'frontline' social work...you could look at posts in allied services / voluntary sector organisations etc that might be a bit less stressful.
The other thing to remember is that your confidence will grow with time in the job.
Hi i work in a CMHT and as a AMHP i would say how you are feeling is not unsurprising its only my opinion but if at all possible continue with the placement and get your degree the way you have shown maturity in these difficult circumstances and a good awareness of what it takes to be a good social worker.
I would hope you are able to use your supervision with the PE at your placement could be used to explore your feelings in particular in regards to transference and debriefing after incidents at work.
It could be that mental health is not the right setting for you at this time but social work is a wide field and some fields suit better than others i started in Children services LAC and a young persons secure unit and quickly found it wasn't for me.
Just a idea but think about joining twitter and following social workers and students on there ive found it a great sounding board and a great source of support. Hope this helps and good luck with whatever decision you come too. Hope you continue we need good young social workers with empathy and self awareness
Most students got through what you have described. It does help either being the winter months and feeling that you have so much work to do before you finish! I done the BA when it frst came about in 2003 and felt the same as youself of my final placement which had been in a CP team. I finished the course and the placement, but heavily reflected and concluded quickly children services was not what I wanted to do when I left.
Take it as a learning exerience and then move on. You only have 30+ days left and that will go as quick as a weekend. Perservere with the course as there are loads of opportunities beyound statutory services when you leave.
You will be a very good social worker who sounds like you really care about people and the experiences they encounte and you will bring a lot to the profession.
Dont quit, your there now and the percentage of people who go back to Uni afterwards is generally quite low!
Good Luck
Like you, I went into social work straight from school. My first placement experience was very difficult too and I doubted myself seriously but stuck with it. 11 years on and I am now a service manager (and a practice teacher) and looking back, I am very glad I stuck with the more challenging times.
You are right to reflect, both on the specific work issues and on the personal elements. This is normal and in working with people, you will always risk coming across something that resonates with parts of your own experience, seek support from your practice teacher and fellow students/colleagues as appropriate but recognise that largely these concerns pass and can be managed. It is important to keep perspective, there are only a few weeks of this placement left and you will be able to be more selective in the area of practice you move into once you qualify, this will help you to build your experience and develop your strengths.
It sounds like you are managing the current issues well and perhaps could ask for support in selecting cases now that specifically relate to your learning needs and in this way be a bit selective about the content in your next 6 weeks.
Mostly I just wanted to say, it would be a real shame not to finish what you have worked so hard for and it seems to me you have the makings of a great practitioner - stick in there!
It sounds like you're meeting your key roles and are on target to pass the placement? 38 days left?!
Have you taken holidays recently from the placement, to get a breather??
I know your health is important but like you say, to at least come away with something and pass the course would be great/ideal. As you say, you don't necessarily have to then go on to practice as a social worker.
You're best using your support network, continue to be honest and open with your colleagues and family and friends, use holidays to recharge your batteries, and try to pass this final placement of yours!
Final resort is I suppose there is the option of withdrawing from this placement, go to a uni panel and ask for a final placement which isn't in a CMHT setting? Whether this would work, I don't know...
The fact you're meeting your key roles is a massive plus, you have alot of positives to cling onto!
Finally, consider delaying your dissertation. Try and focus and prioritise on getting the pgDip element, so that you gain the necessary qualification to be able to practice as a social worker, should you want to do so...
The dissertation is a mammoth piece of work. So if push comes to shove, you may need to prioritise like this? It's at least an option to explore and consider.
Good luck!
I would try and push through the hard times, you will regret it and it will be so worth it in the end. Prove to yourself and others that you can stand pressure! I hope you are happy with your decision and things get a little easier for you.
Good luck xx
Thank-you everybody for your responses - they have been unbelievably helpful!
I've spoken about these things quite honestly with my practice teacher again and decided to take it one day at a time, so to speak.
SInce coming back after Christmas I've still experienced anxiety but not to such a debilitating extent as I was scared of... it has mostly been when I have been sitting around actually as it has been quite quiet the last few days!
Thanks for the advice.
The way that my course is structured, I can't qualify and graduate unless I do my dissertation. If I don't do both, I won't get any sort of qualification/certificate. I would only be able to get an extension on my dissertation if I had "extenuating circumstances" : medical evidence, a bereavement etc...