Diary…A lighter take on the working week

Text messagesonce it was e-mails now text messages. My mobile phone is clogged with people sending me texts instead of e-mailing me. I’ve got some classics stored on my mobile, ranging from a full strategy to unprintable. However, the best things are quite often the simplest. My favourite text is from a colleague and simply says “Can you call me please?” I couldn’t resist the temptation and wrote back, “Why don’t you pick up the ‘phone and speak to me.”

Supervision with my boss first thing in the morning. It’s a usually relaxed affair (I’m generally a well behaved boy) but this morning I find him hunched over his seat, writhing and squirming with something I can’t quite make out in his hands. Thinking I’ve arrived at an…er…unfortunate moment I turn away, “I’ll be back in a minute”, I offer. “Come here, you may be able to help me” Now I’m really alarmed but all is well. “I can’t get this bloody Blackberry thing to work.” The high tech palm top world has entered that of my boss, but he’s struggling. Which is not surprising for someone who has the dexterity of a cow with a gun.

I’ve seen some thingsI spy my colleague lining up 2 mobile phones on his desk. They are facing each other and he has his chin on the desk about a foot away from the ‘phones. I have to ask. “What on earth are you doing?” He grins with the suggestion of someone acting mischievously. “Watch thisconference callHeath Robinson style!” And with that, both ‘phones, which are on loudspeaker setting, blurt into action. He proceeds to have a 3 way conversation with colleagues on the end of each ‘phone and they with each other. He draws quite a crowd and applause at the end of the conversation. I have to admire his ingenuity

I feel so old…I’m training today on a new data base system purchased at great expense by the council. And it’s good, there’s no doubt about that. It’s nice and recognisable, user friendly etc. Trouble is the participants are lacking in skills to get the most out of the system. The trainer himself is a bright young thing and I reckon I’ve got 20 years on him at least. I’m there all day and master about 10% of what’s available. I feel a fraud. “Don’t worry if you can’t grasp it all we’ve scheduled in refresher training,” says our trainer. Refresher training is what I need all rightand not just confined to IT.

The boss still hasn’t mastered his palm top. “There’s no bloody games on it” he says forlornly. I spare him the fact that he just hasn’t found them yet. But he then delivers the nightmare scenario. “These things are good though. It means I can get hold of you, or get some information to you, anytime anywhere!” I explain to him this is a bad idea, I’ve only just learnt to text. Right on cue the ‘phone bleeps to register a new text. “See, people can get hold of me anyway”, I offer. I read the text. It’s from my wife. “Get some milk”, it says.

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